Self-Righteousness Isn’t Always Righteous

I love this new world we live in where everything offends someone. Pretty soon our dictionary is going to be limited to about 17 approved words, and it’s going to be hilarious.

If you were keyed in on the news yesterday you might have come across this story about a mother and her young daughter strolling along in a Target shopping for whatever it is that people shop for at Target. The young daughter, however, was chowing down on a PB&J sandwich, which, as it turns out, is an ungodly offense of the most extreme proportions.

From SFGate:

A mother on a New York parenting blog wrote Monday that while shopping at the store, she gave her four-year-old daughter a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and “a woman stopped me to lecture me about peanut allergies.”

Self-righteousness at its very finest. Love it. Lookout, Target shoppers! The peanut police is out to get you.

It gets better, though:

The child’s mother then asked other moms on UrbanBaby if it was now unacceptable to eat peanut butter in public.

UrbanBaby is an all time name for a blog.

As one might imagine the responses to the mom’s post are… outrageous. Here are a few of my favorites:

I hope no child dies because of any residual peanuts on the cart.”


“Your total disdain for the safety of other kids is awful. Feeding your kid a PB&J in a Target shopping cart is the epitome of low brow. For the love of God at least feed her in the car if you absolutely can’t feed her at home! Everything about your post is vile.”


“I’m from Boston and I would throw some serious side eye at anyone feeding their kid a sandwich in a shopping cart. Nasty.”


“You sound uncaring. Whatever. I wiped down as much as I could for my child’s safety. It’d be nice if people just were a little considerate. I have 2 kids. One with and one without pb allergies. Sure I ‘get’ the idea it’s hard to accommodate another child’s illness but maybe in life you’ll end up on the other end of a stick one day. Have some compassion.”


“So gross – you packed a pb&j for your kid to eat at Target? There’s so much wrong with this it needs to be fake.

The Internet is an amazing place. Also… what credibility does one deserve when he or she is from Boston? Are there peanut butter riots going on up north?

If you click the UrbanBaby link above, you’ll be sent to the thread where the Mom in question posts her inquiry about the little incident and you can see the rest of the responses, which are simply amazing, and only provide further proof that the Internet is where a person’s true colors come out, albeit cloaked in anonymity.

I’d like to know… What happened to minding your own business? Have you never seen a food sampling station in a one of these kinds of stores? People eat in public all the time… get over it, and don’t give me shit about this being a public safety issue.

SFGate mentions:

According to the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Disease about one in 90 people, or 1.1 percent, in the United States has a tree nut or peanut allergy. The Food Allergy and Anaphylaxis Network estimates the total at 0.6 percent.

There are what? 320 million people living in the United States. All of us suddenly need to be cognizant of what we’re eating at all times for the sake of a tiny fraction of people?

Does the world alter the way they live for my sake? I hope not. I couldn’t possibly find a way to be so arrogant that I’d expect all earthlings to go out of their way to accommodate me. “Stop polluting my air with your breath!”

The woman that confronted the mother-daughter combo is all that is wrong with the world. Her self-righteousness is so fake.

Peanut allergy sufferers don’t need self-righteous Target shoppers going to bat for them. This is insane.

I feel like I have some right (hell we all have the right to say whatever we want whenever we want – we have piece of paper in Washington DC to thank for that) to talk about this since I do hold a grudge against smokers (similar principle here – how to we define personal liberties?), but I sure as hell don’t expect my friends to go around the world waving my respiratory health banner in the face of everyone who lights up.

Nor do I. I don’t think we’re going to ban smoking, nor have I ever said that we should.

There is a right way and a wrong way to handle these situations. I don’t want the world to conform to my way of life. People are going to smoke for the rest of time and there is nothing I can do about that. I can voice my opinion in a million different ways, but people will forever continue to slowly kill themselves sucking down on a cancer stick, whether it’s socially acceptable or not, and that’s okay. If I ever come across a smoker, I make them aware of my situation and then let them decide what to do about it.

Maybe this woman in Target was the mother, relative, or friend of someone with a peanut allergy… was that person there? If so diffuse the situation as necessary, or better yet… stay away.

I’m a big peanut guy (great calories/snack for those of us with CF). I love eating them at ballgames or Ranger games or whatever. A bag of peanuts is a great sporting venue snack, but believe it or not I have been asked to watch my shells or crumbs because of a kid sitting nearby with an allergy. I’m happy to oblige in that situation because there is a direct threat and a parent or someone sitting with the kid handled the situation kindly.

But I’m not going to stop eating a Snickers bar in at the local IMAX of respect to a kid with a nut allergy sitting at home 15 miles away, 3 days before he visits the same movie theatre. I will mitigate the risk for someone with an allergy when I know there is a risk at hand, but I will not give up my personal snacking liberty out of a general fear.

Kids need to learn how to speak up for themselves in those kinds of situations, just like I learned how to be cognizant of smokers.

If the kid is too young to speak up for himself or herself, then it’s the parents responsibility to wipe shit down and create a safe environment.

These kinds of stories really get under my skin. Grow a backbone, people – especially all the self-righteous people over on UrbanBaby, and mind your own damn business. It’s not like the mother and her daughter were walking around Target smearing peanut butter all over the place.

“Too bad! Can’t buy that garden hose because there’s a blob of peanut butter on it!”

Your self-proclaimed righteousness is not going to change the world.

If you want to change the world, then actually go out and do it. You’d be surprised by how easy it is to generate a platform… just look at Instagram these days. I’m sure @AngryPeanutButterMama is available.

I’m sick and tired of people spewing baseless facts and acting like they are the world’s police. No peanut butter for you!

The world’s population isn’t going to change the way they live their lives because I have CF, just like I’m going to continue eat peanut products.